Challenging Boys: A Proven Plan For Keeping Your Cool and Helping Your Son Thrive

Learn how to stay calm while you teach your son the skills he needs to face life’s challenges with resilience.

If you have a challenging boy, one who won’t take no for an answer, argues every decision, and explodes at the slightest provocation, you know how incredibly tough it can be to keep your cool when things are hitting the fan. But with the right tools, you can bring out the best in your child—and in yourself as a parent.

In Challenging Boys: A Proven Plan for Keeping Your Cool and Helping Your Son Thrive, Timothy Davis draws on his experience as a child and family psychologist, father of three, and volunteer firefighter to help parents remain calm and in control even when it feels like the house is on fire during yet another meltdown. Davis teaches parents how to create a plan ahead of time to prepare for emergencies (like firefighters do). He shows how to identify and manage specific triggers, recognize the patterns that challenging episodes follow, and make a plan for de-escalating a meltdown when it does occur. This plan is not a one-size-fits-all approach, because every boy is unique; instead, it is based on the child’s individual needs and each parent’s strengths.

While challenging boys can make life difficult for parents, teachers, siblings, and peers, Davis emphasizes that these children actually aren’t oppositional at all. They want to please, but often lack the skills to do so. Challenging Boys teaches parents how to help their boys develop these skills so that their natural gifts can shine.

Praise

"Dr. Davis weaves the science and research of child development with real-world examples, translating abstract concepts into practical, empowering guidance for parents and professionals alike. His empathic and strategic approach offers not only inspiration but also confidence that we can help our most challenging boys grow into men who confront society’s problems with resilience and wisdom. This is an essential guide to fostering stronger relationships, better communication, and harmony within families—bringing new skills and insight."

Christopher Willard, PsyD author of Growing Up Mindful

"Challenging Boys is based on the powerful idea that the pathway to success is understanding yourself and understanding your son. Tim Davis takes readers beyond blame, beyond simplistic solutions, and beyond hopelessness, to a place of hope and the possibility of deep change."

Lawrence Cohen, PhD, author of Playful Parenting and The Opposite of Worry

"Most parents love their children and want to respond in calm, productive ways, but often find themselves losing their cool in the moment. Tim Davis will help you with techniques and strategies for maintaining your calm. And he’ll remind you of ways in which your child is absolutely amazing."

Adele Diamond, PhD, Canada Research Chair Professor of Developmental Cognitive Neuroscience, University of British Columbia, Vancouver

"With clear explanations of the various sources of trouble for kids and their parents, Dr. Davis offers a practical, programmatic plan for parents to work through the problems and generate better solutions for themselves and their children."

Kerry Kelly Novick, FIPA, life-cycle psychoanalyst, co-author of Working with Parents Makes Therapy Work

"Tim Davis offers us an essential guide to parenting ‘challenging’ boys, and in doing so he teaches us how to better parent all children in challenging times."

Mark O’Connell, PhD, author of The Good Father and The Marriage Benefit

"With compelling vignettes and useful exercises, this book is essential reading for parents seeking to rediscover joy in their relationship with their growing boy.”

Claudia M. Gold, MD, pediatrician and author of Getting to Know You: Lessons in Early Relational Health from Infants and Caregivers

In Challenging Boys You'll Learn

  • What’s Really Behind His Defiance: Learn what’s driving your son’s challenging behavior—it’s not your fault, and he’s not a bad kid.
  • How to Stay Calm When Things Get Tough: Find out how to keep your cool and handle stressful moments with calm and confidence.
  • How to Build a Stronger Connection with Your Son: Create a relationship based on trust, teamwork, and mutual understanding.
  • Discipline Tools and Techniques That Work: Learn the proper methods to finally get your son to cooperate and teach him the skills he needs to face life’s challenges with confidence and resilience.